One of those days

Yesterday was one of those days. One of the days where I'm not sure if he's making me grouchy or I'm making him grouchy but we're both very definitely grouchy. One of the days where I spend far too much time on my phone; where I want to be writing or drawing or even running (and I never want to be running) - anything other than repeating the same tired songs in an attempt to keep him happy, to stop the whine.

We went to Walmart to look for baby gates, so that I can turn my back for five seconds without him setting off to eat cat food. There weren't any gates and a man in Walmart told me these were the best days of my life and I thought 'oh dear'. Then we went to PetSmart to look at the animals (so far he prefers PetSmart to any zoo or nature reserve I've taken him to) only all the animals had died or been sold, bar a lethargic mouse and a few sad budgies. Then I went into Old Navy where everything looked like everything I've ever owned, stretched. overwashed and thrown away. Followed by Nordstrom rack where everything was cashmere and really didn't deserve to be covered in baby snot. And then back home for another scrappy nap and the long long wait for Jeremy to get home.

Amid all of this grey boring day, there was a moment where I'd paused for a second to cry and wallow in just how tired, bored and covered in baby snot I was, and W turned around to look at me. I made myself smile at him and the grin I got in return - so perfect and toothless and adoring of me - broke through the grey.

So it was one of those days - snotty, guilty, boring, grey and the most perfect sunshine of a smile.